What is wrong with my mother?

Im 21 and a very proud mommy to my 4 babies. I own been married for almost 4 years and particularly religous. my mother on the other hand is bitter. she is soo neg and consultation about everyone. when she comes over she controlls my house. the other morning she messed with the boil setting/. I was the mistake within her life and never know my real father. she remarried and I be abused by both growing up. they called the cops on me everychance. my younger siblings are treated close to gold/ i spent my teenage yrs on probation due to runing away from the misuse. It always be my fault to them and the system. Now she act like im stupid and my husband is a loser for deliver pizza. It pays our bills.. and clothes our babies. I love my life, a moment ago wished my mom would be more loving. I enjoy been through so much contained by my life, i wonder if im even supposeed to be here...
Answers:

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Well for starters you have more reason than anyone else to be here , especially for your kids and your husband, BUT I am wondering what are you doing by letting your so called mum one around who has given you nil else but misery.

Kick her out for the sake of you and your family's wits and that what my religion says. Some populace are just plain repulsive no matter whether they are mums, dads or any other relation and such population should not be tolerated as they cause more trauma and torment.

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Sounds to me as though you hold the problem. First of all, if you be really abused, the police and child protective services would have removed you from the house. You said the police be involved? Then they would have removed you if in that had be ANY signs of abuse.
Second, you nouns bitter, so why do you let your mother come over? Why is this "abuser" involved in your life span at all? You're still trying to please her. It's in plain sight, you are NEVER going to get from her anything it is you seem to want.

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Look at your babies, and ask yourself again if you're supposed to be here. Of course you are.

What you call for to do is realize that your mother has problems that you can't fix. She clearly have troubles in her chronological that made her into a harsh, impertinent woman, and she did nothing to try and resolve those problems and create a happier go for herself.

But you don't have to follow surrounded by her footsteps. It's time to cut your life free of your mother, and not tolerate her toxic attitude infect you and your children. Tell your mother calmy and politely that her negative attitude and hurtful words are no longer greeting in your home, and that she is no longer allowed to call on if she is going to try and make change, boss you around, gossip, or put down you or your husband/children. Suggest that she desire therapy to promise with her problems, and that you will be optimistic to welcome her hindmost into your life when she is geared up to treat you with respect and love; but until after, the best and most loving thing you can for your relationship is to permit her go her own track, and you go yours, short causing further hurt to respectively other.

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You involve to remember that you can only vary what you control. That is you, and your children. Don't count on changing anyone else or you're doomed to fall short and that includes your husband.
That being said, in that are some things you CAN do to make things better for you.
Explain to her you are no longer a child and will not tolerate fruitless behavior in your home (and utter it in plain words). Lay down the ground rules and be all set to stand by them.
Every action have a consequence, whether we like it or not. Explain to her you will not tolerate it around your children. If you are going to set rules, within needs to be consequences for failing to abide by them (not letting her see your babies, not coming over, doesn`t matter what YOU decide).
It seems approaching you are mature adequate to understand what I'm getting at. She may never be the mom you want her to be, I'm sorry to enunciate. Not everyone is June Cleaver! I know you love her, but you have to be strong for her too.
If you weren't intended to be here, you wouldn't be. God never gives you more than you can bar, even if sometimes it doesn't seem so.
Have somewhat faith, greatly of courage, and be proud of what you've done with your life(but other try to excel further). Let God sort the rest out, the stress just isn't worth it.

Weight/Beauty?

I am sorry that you have such a tough life growing up, and I commend you for your competency to take precision of 4 children at the age of 21. I had my first son when I be 23, and thought I had my hand full with only one! My mother too is negative at times, and become even more so when she has have a few drinks. Maybe your mother is jealous of your duration, maybe she is realize what a crappy life you have growing up and is feeling guilty more or less it, or maybe she is merely plain mean. Who know? Like I said before, my mother is denial at times, and most of the time is rather domineering - in other words, if I am not living my enthusiasm EXACTLY the way she think I should be, then she have to put me down by throwing in negative comments whenever she get a chance. As far your mother thinking your husband is a loser (which incidentaly, in that is nothing WRONG near delivering pizzas), would she fairly you be married to a unemployed, discourteous, alcholic drug addict? At smallest your husband has a work, and is out there doing his best to support his relatives. If you have tried conversation to your mother about the channel you feel, and she is not likely to change, or at lowest make an force to, then in attendance is not much else you can do on your part. Unfortunately, for your own mental condition and sanity, you may hold to limit your visit with your mother (I did this for awhile near my Mom) for awhile and see if this helps. If things receive too unbearable, you may own to just speak about your mother that because of her negativity and controlling ways, that it is just not forceful for you to be around her right now. Sure, she may procure upset, but your first priority is to take meticulousness of yourself so that you can be the best mommy you can to your 4 babies. You sound similar to a survivor; please don't let this situation near your mother get you down. Best of luck to you.

Tubes tied.. no interval..?

i think ur time sounds jus fine tell ur mom to fK rotten and leave u the hell alone is she a drunking whore not 2 be rude but my aunts impossible to tell apart way she locks her frig so lately leave ur mom alone and forget about her and dont answer the door when she comes over

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Of course you are supposed to be here or god would not own blessed you with 4 gorgeous babies.

Cops and Child Services don't always arrest abuse, and I am highly sorry for you that they did not in your grip. If your mother continues to berate you, you should reconsider giving her the oppertunity to do so.

If she be abusinve to you, for heaven sake please don't give up your children alone with her. You've gotten this far lacking her help undoubtedly, so just confer to her in your most adjectives and serious voice and tell her if she can't make over her attitude toward you and your hubby, that she will not be allowed to come around anymore until she changes.

I know she is your mother and individuals often consistency bad for relating their parents how they truely feel, but within is no reason to. you should respect your elder, but they should also earn that respect.