Help im unqualified to be a mom!?

okay, i babysit for my sister 5 days a week from 7-5. I do this so my sister doesn't have to put my neice in a daycare and it would cost more money. However i can't facilitate but feel like she is taking power of me. When she gets home she is talking on her cell phone and doesn't even influence hi to me or her 3 yr old daughter and her daughter starts crying because she has needed to see mommy all day and mommy ignore her. Then she spanks her daughter for crying and acting out! i get so mad because adjectives my neice is doing is wanting attention, so i go pick her up and kiss her head and voice mommy is just busy. Also, her husband and her just split approaching two days ago, and i find that i am doing all of the house work lately...i wash ALL of the laundry, dishes, mop floors, vaccum, dust and plus play mom to my neice and my nephew when he is at his moms. My poor little neice is really mired all in this near her mom and dad fighting all the time even though he is within the process of removing his things from the house. She is so confused! I feel aweful i feel approaching my mom and I and occasionally her father are the only ones that pay attention to her! Especially me! Because i am beside her all of the time. And when my sister gets sour of work on Fridays she is always trying to find someone to keep her daughter, and it is ALWAYS me or my mom. She doesn't grant to pay, which i don't mind i love my neice dearly, but it would be nice to have a short time money to take her to do something, it seems similar to if she is gonna have enough money to walk out she would have enough to disappear us something! My main question is, how do i confront my sister what should i voice and please please what can i do to help my neice so she doesn't feel forsaken...i just don't know what to do! The other day she said, "are you my mom?" and she be dead serious and had a exceedingly confused look in her eye. i just said "no tot, your mommy is at work, your mommy is ****< my sisters name" she looked very sad and confused.please relieve me any advice will work, has anyone else ever be in this situation.


ps.this same situation happened near her first child whom ended up staying with other relatives because my father be very ill.but my mom and i are the solitary ones that my neice has she has no other grandparents or aunts that are trustworthy.

Answers:    yes. she is in recent times getting used to you being around more than her mom, so try cutting fund on the time you spend with her. so she will learn who her mother is .
I know it's concrete but my opinion is that you should talk straight to your sister and if you get the impression comfotable her husband. She needs to know how you feel. I'm not clich?? you should go and complain, but you should calmly shift and talk to her and maybe even enlighten her ablut the "are you my mom". Good Luck. This is a very very desperate situation. I am a single mother to a 10 month old little girl. AT night, when I work, she any stays with my sister or my boyfriend. When this has to begin, i feel just awful. I agitation these people think im taking authority of them even though they both insist I am not and they love to do it. However, every single second I get to spend with my daughter is 1 on 1 attention time. To the point that her separation anxiety from me is for a while extreme, I think ive spoiled her for fear of one like YOUR sister. I would guess that she is feeling overwhelmed next to her break up, and as a working mother. (if you want to call her that...) Ill play devils advocate and say-so that shes not really aware of the mistakes that shes making. You should say "Hey sis, Id love to take the child to the zoo, mind tossing me 40 bucks for the day??" or whatever else you might hold planned. if she says no, i cant afford it, thats a good time to utter, I understand kids are so expensive. however, I noticed that you give the impression of being to want to spend a lot of time and money on yourself and Im sure you dont realize but the baby is self neglected. I know this might hurt you, which is why i havent said it before, but you probably dont realize that the baby asked ME the other light of day is i was her mother" upon hearing that, if shes a existing human, she will be shaken to the core. i wish ou all the best. get underway communication is surely the way to go. and thank god this little girl have people like you and your mom surrounded by her life. .
you've got to confront her it will be intricate but its her child so really shes putting a lot of pressure on you and none of this is your fault. regardless it will be strong to tell her but you can get through it. enlighten her look I know your days are tough with work and everything happening and I don't wanna be a bother but you own a daughter. The other day she asked if I was her mom. I mull over you may need to spend some more time with her. See how she responds. next continue with what you ponder. Tell her it's also hard for you to take on the responsibility of a child and its unreasonable for your niece. Hope I helped. LOTS OF LUCK.

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